Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Did you become a cuckold for your wife?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t cotton to rapists

What is the difference between "eher" and " lieber" in German? Are the two synonyms? If yes, then which one is the most used?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Why won't my mom let me come home if I'm homeless?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What is your response when someone says "how may I help you"?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I can count

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What does it feel like to "lose your looks" to age?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why don’t Jews regard Jesus as an important teacher or rabbi, if not the Messiah? Putting aside messianic claims, wouldn’t Jesus be one of the most significant Jewish teachers in human history?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Why is my elder sister so mean?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Threads is testing spoiler text, Zuckerberg says - TechCrunch

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What is the estimated number of people with an extra X chromosome?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It seems that I am cursed with bad luck. How do I break such a curse?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

How can I move on from my ex?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

How do I maintain and care for granite countertops in a coastal climate like Pompano Beach?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I actually pay taxes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can read

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t buy bullshit

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light